Two months ago, Olivia couldn’t get invited to the important meetings. When she was, no one listened to her. Now she is leading the team.
This never happens unless you’re causative.
It all began when a re-organization thrust Olivia into a new department. She felt like a failure almost immediately.
She was given work beneath her capability. Whenever she spoke up, she was immediately dismissed. They gave a project that would have rightly belonged to Olivia to someone less qualified. No one would talk with Olivia, and her boss kept canceling their one-on-one meetings.
Olivia was being pushed out and was terrified by the way it was going. She was even more terrified that she was going to be let go.
None of Olivia’s prior successes meant anything to the new team. None of her previous allies were there to help her. She was alone.
The people on the new team were openly hostile, smug, superior, stubborn, cold, uninviting, and often mean.
Olivia very badly wanted to blame them.
But Olivia did something that most people don’t do when faced with a situation like this.
She decided to “up” her level of responsibility and find out what she was doing wrong that was causing her to fail, and to discover what she could do about it.
It’s very easy when you’re blaming others to put it all on them and decide there’s nothing you can do about it unless they change. That seals whatever rotten condition you’re in permanently. Most people leave when that happens.
Olivia decided to stay and to face it. Olivia decided to transform it. And she showed up here to learn how. I’ll tell you what happened and how she did it.
In Causative Communication, we create scenarios just like the ones you’re facing to see how you’re dealing with challenges, so I can see your current way of approaching others and your current level of communication skill.
During your first video, we assess you to determine what you’re doing well and what strategies and communication abilities you need to develop to remove all the barriers you’re facing that get in the way of your success.
Olivia’s “Before” video was very revealing.
Olivia thought she was masking her growing lack of confidence. She thought she was covering up her fear and her resentment really well.
She didn’t realize what most people don’t realize about themselves, especially when they’re experiencing even slightly negative or anxious emotions:
Everything comes out in your tone of voice, especially in the way you look at people.
People think they’re hiding their feelings. Let me assure you, they’re not.
When we showed Olivia her first video, she was horrified.
She said, “I had no idea how I sound. I had no idea I look like that.”
Most people don’t, until they see themselves on video. There’s a disconnect between how they WANT to look and sound, and how they actually do look and sound. When they see this, initially it’s a shock. And then we get to work to transform it.
Everything about Olivia was dark. She came across all doom and gloom, combined with anxiety, resentment and blame.
So, whenever Olivia offered to contribute to a project, she came across badly, not at all what she intended. She realized that’s why people ran away from her as fast as they could.
Olivia transformed during the coaching. Every video after that showed dramatic progress. Olivia developed new strategies. New ways of approaching others. New abilities. Olivia learned how to handle not just that situation, but any conversation, any situation, any challenge. It was real personal growth. You could visibly see her inner beauty growing throughout the process.
Olivia went from dark to radiant. She was very much herself and she became beautiful, magnetic and compelling. She was blown away by her final video.
Then Olivia went silent for 3 weeks. It turns out Olivia’s success was on a skyrocket trajectory that was beyond anything she imagined. She emailed us:
“WOW! My presence and demeanor have completely transformed through this process and I am truly amazed. I’m in a place to really excel now. Results were VERY FAST. I have literally gone from working at 25% capacity to 100% capacity as the key program I wanted to work on has taken flight. They asked me to lead the team for it. Everyone is listening to me. I am fully in charge. The results are golden.”
Olivia had become golden.
As Olivia became radiant and compelling, the people she works with changed. They HAD been cold and somewhat hostile. They changed from cold to warm, to welcoming Olivia and greatly appreciative of her. They pushed her into a leadership position because they wanted her there.
She’s happy because it’s where she belongs – in a place she can inspire and influence.
It’s a new life for Olivia, which is what being causative does for everyone.
Transformation to a causative life starts with self-awareness. The journey begins when you decide to stop fixating on what “they” are doing (that’s reactive, not causative), and start listening to that little voice in you that demands improvement and says, “It doesn’t have to be this way. I can do something about it. I can do something to change it.”
You change, they change. You transform, they transform.
It always happens. It’s as reliable as the law of gravity.
People think they don’t have power. The truth is, you have all of the power. It’s waiting for you this minute to claim and use to create the extraordinary outcomes you dream about.
Be the cause!