Some people think you have to be “born with” the skills and charisma that make a really great public speaker. Not true. Let me tell you the story of Larry.
I was invited to give a two-hour talk on presentation skills at a technical conference for a highly specialized professional association.
At the banquet the night before my presentation, I told the President of the association, Steve, that I wanted to line up a volunteer to coach during my talk. He asked what qualities I was looking for and I said, “Someone who really needs to improve in this area.”
He enthusiastically told me Larry would be perfect and I said, “Let’s go meet him.” Well, meet him I did. Larry hardly took his eyes off the floor while we were talking, and for the brief moments they did come off the floor, they went straight to the ceiling or the wall. Turns out, Steve interpreted my request as, “Who is the absolute worst communicator in this group?”
I told Larry, “You know, I’m going to be coaching you in front of 300 people.” He glared at me for a brief moment and said, “What does THAT mean?” I said, “I’m going to be telling you what to do and you’re going to have to do it. Are you okay with that?” He mulled it over a little (looking at the ceiling) and then said, “I guess that’s okay.” And so it was.
After Larry left, Steve said, “I hope you’re going to coach him on looking at people!” And then laughed for 2 minutes straight.
I asked Steve, “What does the group think of Larry?” Steve said, “Everyone thinks he’s the worst communicator in the group” and started laughing again.
Turns out that Larry has been the worst communicator in the group for decades (he’s probably pushing 60). I said, “Steve, I not only have to teach him how to look 1 person in the eye, which he’s never done, he’s going to have to go from never looking 1 person in the eye to looking at 300 in one fell swoop!” Steve said, “I can’t wait.”
In the morning Larry was surprisingly enthusiastic when I talked to him before the talk. I told him that I was going to coach him to bring out his natural charisma and he said, “My what?” I explained and he seemed to like it.
As Steve introduced me, the group laughed like mad when they heard I picked Larry for my volunteer.
Before I started the actual coaching, Larry did a “before” presentation where he was looking off to the side and pretty much mumbling to himself. No one seemed surprised and we all applauded.
Then I started teaching Larry how to own the room. Simply looking at the whole room just about killed him. But, bless his heart, he did a great job of it. He really stepped up to the plate and, by George!, he GOT it! He owned the room.
I had him present again. Wow! He was so much better! I asked the group, “How many people saw a difference?” EVERY hand went up. I said, “Let’s give Larry some feedback” and he got more positive feedback in 3 minutes than he’s gotten in the last 3 years. He looked rather pleased.
Then I told him what he needed to do to REALLY connect with the audience and make each person feel like he was talking directly to them. He looked at me like he couldn’t believe I actually wanted him to do this. I coached. He did better. I coached some more. He somehow got it through his head that he wasn’t going to get off the stage until he did it and SUDDENLY WHAMO ZAMO ZAP! Larry was COMMUNICATING!!!!! All the way to the back of the room!!! And he was really CONNECTING with PEOPLE!!!!!
It’s no exaggeration to say Larry had charisma.
At two points during his talk, Larry was interrupted by spontaneous and enthusiastic applause while he was speaking. The audience was completely captivated, engaged, and loving him. No other conference speaker got as much applause!!!!! Not even the ones who were paid high fees!
No one wanted it to be over and Larry was MOBBED after his talk.
Afterward Larry came up to me and said, “I learned so much. I’m going to use what I learned for the rest of my life.” Well, you just had to hug him.
If there was ever a person who would have been voted “least likely to succeed at public speaking” before this day, it would have been Larry.
When I say, “Everyone has this ability inside them,” I want you to know I mean everyone. This is why I love coaching people and helping them gain these skills. When you bring out the “star” in a person, it’s a glorious moment. When they know and have the skills, they can do it themselves forever more.
So, if you’ve ever had the feeling that public speaking isn’t something you’re fabulous at, I want you to know you can be. And pretty quickly too. Don’t listen to anyone who says you can’t.
The Transformative Presentation Skills Workshop coming up in November is a powerful opportunity to make this shift in a very short time. I am absolutely thrilled to be delivering this workshop personally and seeing each person achieve a beautiful transformation.
Should you be there? Only if you want a result like the one Larry experienced.
Be the cause!
